Friday, June 1, 2012


Hey, look! There's grandchildren growing in my garden!

Okay, so I’ve been missing in action this week. Sorry about that. This doesn’t happen often, or ever actually, but I simply couldn’t write this week. My cup has been over flowing with family and emotions that simply pushed writing deadlines to the bottom of the list. I love to write.  Books, articles, blogs, email… anything really, but not so much this week. I searched and nothing was there. It was like the ink well had just a small residue stuck around the insides of the bottle, but not enough to form words or thoughts.
So, I found myself living totally in the present. It was all I had the strength for and quietly honestly, the heart for. All around me were grandchildren, sons, daughters-in-laws, parents and family pets. Every nook and cranny of our house and my heart was filled with laughter or tears or squeals or teasing or jokes or conversation both serious and silly. Silence had been forced to run for the hills as cousins—three three-year-olds, one fifteen-month-old, a five-year-old, a seven-year-old and an eight-year entered the doorway with drawn light sabers and an ark-load of dolls and stuffed animals. 
My dad is deep into Alzheimer’s. So, what doesn’t kill you just makes you stronger, right? I love this man. He taught me to drive and to dive, however, now he can’t find his way out of my living room without help. Most of the time I felt like my heart was being stung by a thousands bees at once. But every once in a while, we’d get a glimmer of the man that was and the rest would be worth it.
And then there was my mom. She’s Dad’s caregiver and it’s taking its toll. I see our roles slowly reversing. She was the strong one, my anchor, and the one who made it happen. Now, it’s my turn to balance the role of mother, wife, daughter, and mother-in-law and grandmother like plates in the air. I’m praying I can catch them all in sure, strong, loving hands… like she used to.
Sorry, I missed my blog deadlines this week. But, I was where I should be and doing what I should have been doing. Life is like that sometimes. It narrows down to a pinpoint… and then expands to every corner of the room.
And, God saw that it was good.
See you next week… on time I should think.


josh cleveland said...

dear mom,
you are my hero.

The LuLu Chronicles said...

Thank you, Joshua. And you are mine...